Your Husband's Role in Business
Juggling a business and a marriage can feel difficult at times. Your husband is your teammate, learn how to support each other well.
If you are an entrepreneur with a spouse, you know that business is best when it is a family affair.
If you are a woman running a business on your own, you know that the family dynamic often comes into play right at the start, when there are investments to be made.
So many women find it difficult to ask their husband to invest financially in their work as it begins to grow. This can be one of the biggest stumbling blocks for women. However, the key to asking for your husband's support is confidence. You should be sure of yourself, the program you're planning to use, and the research you've done. If you've done your prep work, you can approach your husband knowing that, if he invests in you, he'll see the fruits of his decision soon.
Marriage is, first and foremost, a team dynamic. That means that, from the husband's side, investing in you is a smart move. As you get stronger, he gets stronger, and vice versa. Not only that, but he'll be motivated to do his own research and give the decision to invest its due consideration simply because, if you did all that work, he'd better have a good reason for saying “no.”
In all this, it is important for wives to remember that, although your husband is by your side, he is not in your business. His mind is elsewhere, so be careful not to simply blindside him with a request that he invest in your endeavors without any information or time to think. This can often lead to resentment down the road, or just a resounding “no.”
On the subject of the word 'no,’ unfortunately, this is where a lot of husbands’ brains go into instinct mode when asked for a hefty investment. Wives, don't react too quickly. A negative answer may not be the end. In your husband's mind, 'no’ might be blurted out from a place of caution, inexperience, the desire to protect you from risks and disappointment, or he may simply want more time to think it over.
A great way to avoid this altogether is to sit down with your spouse when you first get wind of a coach or program you'd like to invest in. Ask your husband what he'd like to know about the program or the investment itself if you were to do it. Let him prepare before you ever get on a phone call with the coach in question.
“You’re in the trenches, your husband is not. His mind isn’t with you, he's doing his own thing.”
- Roberto Lara (15:38)
It's a sad truth that, very often, men with entrepreneurial wives feel left out or even replaced by their spouse's work. With that said, ladies, it's important to find an appropriate way to incorporate your husband into your business. “Appropriate” means setting boundaries. Broadly speaking, men are problem solvers. If you ask your husband to pick up a task related to your work, he may accidentally end up way deeper in your business than either of you wanted. It’s important to regularly be mindful and communicate about the boundaries you both need.
A major factor driving all of these concepts is different energy dynamics men and women carry with them. They can feel opposing at times, but there is a need for balance between the two. Where men tend to be compartmentalizing go-getters, women are socialized to make decisions with everyone else in mind first, prone to asking permission and wanting to include their husband in everything.
While it can be challenging to find the balance, the entrepreneurial couple can be a powerhouse. Each partner has their own passions, skills, and roles to play, even if they do business together. When there is a balance in the combination of these energies and skills, the couple can become unstoppable and unbelievably successful.
Redefine “power couple” by balancing your energies.
A great analogy for this dynamic can be found in the game of soccer. Different players serve different roles on the field. A business-owning wife is, in this case, the player who drives for a goal. Think of her husband like the goalie. If the wife is doing an amazing job, the husband might not ever need to play. Regardless, she needs him to be there. He has capabilities and perspectives that she doesn't have, but desperately needs.
“I’m investing in you as a partner, because the stronger you become, the stronger I can become. We're a team, we become stronger together.”
- Roberto Lara (11:30)
After the investments and hills and uncertain moments are over, what matters is that each partner is committed to pushing their spouse to grow and improve. If that's the case, the investment is always worth it. But most importantly, remember that no business should ever jeopardize your marriage. Your family is worth so much more.
How to get involved
Follow @theparttimeceopodcast on Instagram for special, podcast related updates!
For more resources, information on my coaching services, and a whole community of Part-Time CEOs, find me on Facebook at The Part-Time CEO® Group, my website, or email me at janelle@janellelara.com.
If you liked this episode, be sure to subscribe and leave a quick review on iTunes here. It would mean the world to hear your feedback and we’d love for you to help us spread the word.